As Fate Would Have It
by RisuBento
Summary: Okay...so she hadn't seen Sasuke in well over 8 years...sooo...how come her reflection in the mirror is none other than the last Uchiha himself? She looked down at her boxers. BOXERS! Is that...is that...A PENIS? A story of Sakura's life being twisted around in ways she never expected, all because of her chakra laced fist and an AWOL Chidori. Love at first body swap.


**As Fate Would Have It**

 **1**

 ** _Disclaimer:_** EVEN THOUGH NARUTO IS DONE I STILL DON'T OWN HIM. OR ANYTHING FROM THE NARUTO UNIVERSE. THIS NEEDS TO BE CHANGED.

Summary: S/S Okay...so she hasn't seen Sasuke in well over 8 years...sooo...how come her reflection in the mirror is none other than the last Uchiha himself? She looked down at her boxers. BOXERS?! WTF. Is that...is that...A PENIS!? A story of Sakura's life being twisted around in ways she never expected, all because of her chakra laced fist and an AWOL Chidori. Love at first body swap.

O0O0O0O0O0O0O0O0O

* * *

"Ne, Sakura-chan?"

"Hm?"

"What's it like being a girl?"

"…what?"

"You know…like how's it different from being a guy?"

"…."

"Come on, Sakura-chan!"

"I can't…I don't…even know how to answer you, Naruto."

"Don't worry, Naruto. You're more of a girl than you realize since you're dickless."

"ARRRRRGGGGH! SAI! I AM NOT DICKLESS!"

 _Siiiiiiiiiiigh._

This was how her mission began that fateful week. It was nearing October and the weather was shifting quickly to coolers temps and changing leaves. Heading to the Land of Waves was going to be tricky if they ran into Mist Ninja. They weren't exactly on the best of terms with Mist as of late.

As fate would have it, she set out early on this brisk morning with her boys. Kakashi, Naruto, Sai and Yamato…and things were definitely taking an interesting turn.

'Who even asks a question like that?' She wondered to herself.

"Only Naruto would come up with something like that."

Sakura looked up, surprised that someone read her mind but smiled slightly when she saw that it was Kakashi. Leave it to her former sensei to creepily know what she was thinking.

"That's true." She grinned, tapping a finger to her lips in wonder. She glanced back at the two bickering men and sighed. They weren't even five miles from the main gates of Konoha and they were already getting on her nerves.

"HEY, you ass! Want me to prove to you I'm not a girl!? Huh?! I'll prove it to you, you MIME!"

Sakura heard the distinct sound of a zipper being zipped down and she snapped. Flash stepping from her spot next to Kakashi, she appeared in the blink of an eye, landing a swift kick to Sai and Naruto, sending them careening into the trees.

"Idiots! Knock it off and get focused! This is an A-Rank mission so stop trying to compare dick sizes and get MOVING!" She yelled.

 _5 minutes later…._

"Ne, Sakura-chan. You never answered my question." Sakura let out an exasperated exhale and pinched the bridge of her nose.

"Fine. You really want to know what it's like being a girl?" He bobbed his head up and down eagerly. She mentally groaned before grinning. Maybe she'd throw out some jargon in some scientifically correct terms to make Naruto squirm. After all, why beat around the bush?

"Well Naruto. Around the ages of twelve to fourteen a girl goes through "a change"—she used her fingers for emphasis—"a change in which her body begins the stages of growing into a woman."

She glanced over at her blonde friend who was rapt with attention. She was sure he had more a perverted edge to his wanting to know about this topic. Maybe she could have a little fun.

"Basically, around those ages, once a month for about three to four days—give or take—girls begin to expel blood from their vagina's." She felt him stiffen next to her in discomfort at the last word she said. "It's when the uterus sheds its layers when your body realizes that an egg hasn't been fertilized by a sperm." She snickered slightly at the confused look on his face. She continued.

"During those years, we go through growing pains—sometimes literally. Our bodies can't figure what to do with itself, not to mention the raging hormones. We'll experience gangly legs, hips unsure of where to jut out to, one boob usually popping out bigger that the other one." Sakura was trying so hard not to bust out laughing. "And by boob I mean—"

"I know what a BOOB is!" Naruto squeaked quickly, pink resting itself on his upper cheeks. Sakura nodded and continued. She was having waaaaay too much fun.

"Then! Finally when everything is perfectly proportioned, the topic of a woman's main gossip during these days begins to show itself." She paused. "SEX."

Naruto let out a squeak and she could have sworn she heard a light snicker and a cough come from Kakashi and Yamato in front of them.

"S-Sakura-chan…you don't need to…"

"Naruto, I'm not finished." She was determined to finish this. Without laughing. Hopefully without laughing.

"So in the event of sex, there's a small film of tissue call the Hymen just inside the entrance to the vagina that is torn when penetrated by a penis—"

Naruto gulped loudly, his face burning red by now.

"—and when torn, her virginity technically ceases to exist. At least in medical and scientific terms. It can be extremely painful and girl's will often bleed from their first time—"

"SAKURA!"

"Shhhhh! Let me finish! Now with pregnancy. A woman's blood pressure rises, our organs are squished to accommodate the growing fetus—that's a baby—and our ankles swell, we gain gobs amount of weight—and don't forget about the appetite increase—then depending on the woman and how quickly that baby wants to be out of its mama's uterus, a woman could be in labor for a couple hours to up to a day or more in rare cases. She has to push this baby—think of a small oblong watermelon being pushed through a hole the size of a quarter—it stretches, don't worry—sometimes the vagina tears—"

"OMG. THAT'S ENOUGH! I can't! I'm gonna be sick!"

Sakura busted out laughing.

"So, you mean to say, ugly, it would be sort of be like us men pushing a melon through the opening of our penises—"

"GAH!" Naruto screamed, grabbing his junk as if it was in pain. Sakura had tears forming in her eyes, she was laughing so hard.

"You should see the look on your face, Naruto!" She gasped between laughs.

"Ugh! I can't even look at you right now, Sakura-chan. I'm glad I'm a guy for sure!"

"That remains to be seen…dickless."

"SAI!"

Sakura shook her head, her laughter coming to an end. She smiled and jogged up to Kakashi and Yamato, the latter looking slightly pale.

"How long until we get to the Land of Waves?" She asked lightly. Kakashi cleared his throat and fumbled with his Icha Icha book.

"About two days at this pace." He answered, also unable to look her in the eye.

"Well then. We had better pick up the pace!" She smiled and began running ahead. They all paused in their steps and watched their only female teammate rush ahead of them.

"Shit…." Yamato muttered, wiping some sweat from his brow.

"Women have it bad." Naruto muttered come up beside him.

All four men stood there without saying anything.

"I am…uncomfortable?" Sai suddenly said, breaking the awkward silence. Everyone fidgeted, adjusting the front of their pants before silently agreeing.

* * *

When Sakura woke up, she noticed three things.

One, it was raining outside the tent, which meant that her hair was only to be a frizzball of a mess.

Two, she was starving which was strange because it usually took her a good couple of hours after waking before she felt hungry. Maybe they'd find a nice dango place or-OOOOOH! Shrimp tempura!? She grinned at the idea and felt her stomach growl.

The last thing she noticed was subtle at first. She hadn't opened her eyes yet, hoping to slip back into a good sleep for a while longer when she felt a sudden squeeze on her breasts. Something warm was also encased around her from the back as well as something firm jutting into her butt. In any other circumstance—ok there wasn't another circumstance—she'd definitely never been in a situation where her breasts were being squeezed along with her butt at the same time.

She cracked an eye open and was met with the sleepy frown of Sai—inches from her face. It's happened before; he's usually a pretty innocent sleeper around her. She glanced down—his hands were squishing her breasts through her shirt. A flush instantly covered her face and rage consumed her when a pair of arms gripped her from behind, encircling her into their grasp. She froze, her fist stopped inches from punching Sai in the face when she heard a mumble.

"Mmmm…Sakura-chaaaaan…more ramen please…" the voice breathed hot air across her neck sending shivers down her body. Naruto was spooning her and he shifted again—pressing his pelvis into her butt when she felt again the offending jut of something… "Oh god!"

"SHANNARO!"

Kakashi looked up from his book and Yamato stopped pouring tea into his cup to turn towards the tent. Two loud smacks were heard and a pink blur came flying out of the tent.

Sakura was huffing deep breaths; looking frazzled and bed mussed. She had a deep red blush tingeing her face.

"Neeeeee! Sakura-chan! I didn't mean tooo! Why did you hit me!?"

"It's because you were pressing your erect penis into her butt, dickless."

"Sai! I can't help morning wood! See! You have it too!"

"Why are you looking at my penis? Are you gay?"

"Ugh! At least I wasn't groping her boobs!"

Sakura slammed her foot onto the ground causing a fissure to crack towards the tent, sending a chunk of earth beneath the canvas fort and its two bickering occupants flying back into the trees.

She huffed and regained her composure, no longer breathing hard, and walked towards the stream nearby to wash her face.

"Ohayo, Sakura-chan." Yamato spoke up, choking slightly, trying to hold back a laugh. She threw her senpai a glare, which shifted to Kakashi's lone eye. He gave her an eye-crinkling grin beneath his mask, choosing to not say anything. Sakura clenched her fist.

He chose well.

She stalked to the stream and shed her sandals and waded into the chilly water. She could feel her face getting stuck with a permanent scowl.

"Seriously…frickin Naruto and his wandering appendages…" She shuddered slightly and crossed her arms over chest, still feeling Sai's groping hands.

"What did I do in my previous life to be stuck on a team with four men?" She snorted to herself. She squatted down and cupped some water into her hands and splashed it into her face. She gasped, the air leaving her lungs for a moment at the freezing temp of the water. She shivered. Probably not the best idea for the lone medic on a team of idiot ninja to get sick from standing in a cold river.

The rain was a slight drizzle now, which made her hair slick. She grumbled. In all 24 years of her life she'd never once cared if her hair was perfect until the last year or so. Except maybe the 6 years she was in love with Sasuke—She felt her chest tighten.

Wow. Back track a little bit. She hadn't thought about Sasuke in age's…hell…she hadn't seen him since they were 16. After the war….

' _He didn't want to stay. He said that he needed to find himself, because he had nothing left.'_

"Tch. As if Naruto and I were considered nothing." She felt herself pout before mentally slapping herself. She'd come to terms with her feelings for Sasuke years ago. Sure there was a dull ache in her chest when she thought about him—he WAS after all her first love.

Ok this time she really smacked herself and with the stinging of her right cheek she hopped back out of the water and headed back to her favorite band of bakas.

* * *

FINALLY. They were on their way home. At least a days worth of travel left and she'd be home in a hot shower, a warm bed and making her rounds at the hospital. She smiled to herself, while concentrating on leaping from branch to branch. She loved her job. She got to meet new people everyday, treat their sickness or wounds. She was the best at what she does, having surpassed her shishou years ago. Her job wasn't just a job—it was her calling. It was the masterpiece of herself. Of course she would never get used to the death that unfortunately came with the job. Who could? She found, sometimes, that you became numb to it…only for her the numbness vanished the moment she closed the front door of her home. Sakura usually found herself the next morning, after sobbing herself to sleep, in a hot messy heap in the front foyer. Then, she'd tell herself again and again, after picking herself up off the floor, that it was a new day and she had more people needing her treatments and to not dwell on what fate threw at her everyday.

She'd done well for herself. At 21, she'd made the decision to move out of her parent's home and purchase her own property. At first she was looking for a cute, quaint little fixer upper, two bedrooms, two bathrooms, maybe a backyard for a small garden. She'd found some promising properties and was ready to put in an offer on one of them near the hospital….until Naruto got wind of her plans.

He'd confronted her one day in her office at the hospital and beamed that he was going to help her look for a home and that he'd—much to her dismay—had found the perfect home. She'd groaned and asked where it was, to humor him of course.

"I'll show you!" He chimed, grabbing her arm the second she'd hung up her white doctor's jacket.

Needless to say…the house was a decrepit hunk of junk. Apparently damaged in the war, the owners had abandoned the, probably once beautiful traditional Japanese style home, complete with a courtyard and koi pond in the middle of the home, and they never returned. Shoji screens were gone or smashed, holes in the walls and floors, shingles ripped away leaving opened sections in the roof. Sakura was two seconds away from pummeling Naruto when the realtor showed up practically begging for them to buy the house.

After much bickering with Naruto a good while about how it would take more and more and more of her already non-existent time to fix this place, even if it _was_ being sold for $20,000…he'd made her see the light. Barely.

"Come on Sakura-chan. It's a little out of the way from the hospital but I was walking past it the other day—and I instantly thought of you. Remember when you said you've always wanted something to build up and make it completely yours?" He said, throwing an arm around her neck while holding his other hand out as if presenting the house.

Sakura had stopped. She did remember saying that once—easily three or four years ago and she was honestly touched that Naruto remembered something like that. She'd looked back up at the falling apart house and made a decision-and three days later she owned a home…

…And gained a roommate. Naruto had failed to mention that his apartment building had been bought out and condemned to be demolished for some much nicer and newer apartments to be built. The only solution—because Sakura couldn't just leave the guy without a place to live—they'd come to an agreement that Naruto would help pay for a portion of the mortgage and he'd help her fix the entire place up.

It wasn't that bad of deal either. Surprisingly, Naruto knew how to fix a lot of things. She truly wondered where he'd found the time to learn how to fix a roof or wire the electricity. She'd come to the conclusion that he was a jack-of-all-trades…and yet still a master of none.

After employing the help of the men of their former rookie grouping—and the girl's lounging and squealing at the sight of the shirtless hardworking men before them—the house had been patched up and redone in less than a month.

"Ne, Sakura-chan?" Naruto asked suddenly.

"Hmm?" She answered over her shoulder, as she leapt to another tree branch.

"Can you feel that?"

"Feel what?" She asked, wondering what he could possibly be talking about.

"That chakra. Can you feel it?" He asked again.

Sakura frowned and used her chakra to open up and search for any nearby chakra source other than her teams. To her left she felt a strong burst of chakra and yet it was faint as if it was trying to be suppressed but couldn't. She closed her eyes and felt with her chakra more clearly. The foreign chakra…wasn't so foreign. It was all too familiar.

"You feel it?" Naruto spoke to her in an awed whisper, appearing next to her in a leaping stride.

"Yeah, I feel it…it's…" She couldn't finish the sentence. So she let Naruto.

"It's HIM." He breathed, his eyes widening.

"Kakashi!" She hissed. The said man was already on the alert, pausing to stop on a tree ahead of them.

"It's Sasuke." Naruto said, jumping onto the branch next to their former sensei.

Sakura swallowed tightly. She could feel her heart speeding up, pounding hard in her throat. She needed to get it under control. She couldn't let her emotions rule herself now. But…it had been so long since she'd seen him—since they'd ALL seen him. She didn't feel for him anymore right?

Yes. She had moved on. She'd had to. There was no room for her "somewhat" emotions for him to get in the way. Especially right now.

"Kakashi? What should we do?" She asked, fastening her gloves tighter around her wrists. She didn't know if they had to fight him. They honestly didn't know anything about their old teammate anymore. Did he look different? Was he taller? Stronger? Faster? More handsome? She shook her head at the last part. 'Stop it, Sakura.'

"We proceed." Kakashi spoke, his lone eye taking his team in before glancing back in the direction of Sasuke's chakra. "Although he's no longer considered an enemy or missing-nin of Konoha, we still must take precautions. We haven't seen or heard anything of him in many years. Everyone be on the alert."

All of them nodded. Sakura felt so hesitant. She was…afraid? Why would she be afraid? She was strong. She was a more than capable kunoichi. Hokage's apprentice. Master of Medical Ninjutsu. She was practically considered a Neo-Sannin. As well as Naruto. So why? Why was there such a feeling of dread and sourness? She wasn't afraid of Sasuke. No. She was afraid of what herself. What she was feeling. She couldn't afford to feel. She wasn't a ninny. She definitely still had all her emotions and used them for everything but when it came to Sasuke…she'd felt she had a sense of proving herself to him. To show him that she wasn't weak.

Kakashi nodded to them and jumped from the branch he perched on, only to suddenly be blown back behind them by a blast of a chakra shockwave that emanated from the region where Sasuke was. They were all blown back, Sakura smacking painfully against a tree trunk and Naruto and Sai were thrown into the undergrowth. Sakura tried to catch her breath after having it violently knocked out of her and stumbled to stand up.

"Naruto!? Are you guys all right?" She yelled, rubbing a green chakra laced hand to the back of her head where it ached with the beginnings of a migraine. Possible concussion. Kakashi appeared next to her, his hand resting on her shoulder. She looked at him and found nothing wrong. She nodded to him and ran to find Naruto and Sai. Yamato, she noticed was nowhere to be seen before a tree to her left morphed out of shape and back into the man himself.

"Damn. What was that?" Yamato asked. He seemed unharmed as well, from her quick cursory scan as she jogged past. Naruto was already sitting up, Sai was knocked out cold.

"Are you guys okay?" She asked kneeling next to Naruto. He looked up at her with a glazed over look in his eyes.

"My head and arm hurt." He mumbled out. Sakura put her hands on his head and deduced that he too had a possible concussion. All she could do right now was take away the migraine and when they returned home she'd be able to do more at the hospital. She heard him hiss when she bumped her hip against his arm and she looked down and saw that his forearm was disconnected from his upper arm and twisted at a weird angle. She swallowed and had him lay back.

"Naruto, you have a concussion and your arm his broken. I need you to relax the best you can while I reset it." She swallowed again. Of all the things she did in the field of medicine, resetting bones was not her favorite. She could deal with blood and guts spilling all over the place. She could deal with autopsies on the dead; digging around in corpses was morbid but she was fascinated by it and not in a sick sense. She just loved to continuously learn how the human body worked. No. She couldn't deal well with bone resetting because usually the person was conscious and in intense pain. They would scream, matching the screaming in her head, and as much as she wanted to run away from hearing the crunching of bones being pushed back together, she had a job to do. Hearing her patients in pain, gave her pain and she wished she could just kiss the booboos away but alas…life as a medic-nin was of course never that simple.

Sakura glanced down at Naruto again. He was sweating and grinding his teeth in pain. She placed her hands on either side of his arm and readied herself.

"Naruto? On the count of three I'm going to reset it. I want you to count okay? It's…it's going to be really painful but bear with me okay?" He looked at her with pain filled eyes and nodded quickly, letting out shuddering breaths in anticipation. Sakura steeled herself. She nodded at him to start counting.

"One—" He hissed before Sakura twitched her hands just right and she had to hold back the bile that rose in her throat at the sound of the bones crunching together. Naruto let out an animalistic yell and with one of her hands she pushed him back down onto the ground when he lifted himself to push her off. He had tears leaking out of eyes, leaving tracks in the dirt that was smudge on his face.

"Sakura-tch…YOU SAID ON THE COUNT OF THREE!" He yelled, grimacing. Sakura nodded and then shook her head.

"If it had been on three it would have hurt a lot more because you were anticipating the pain. I had to do it when you least expected it." She answered, sitting back on her folded legs, wiping the sweat on her forehead. Sai suddenly sat up, from his position next to Naruto, and looked wildly bewildered.

"Sai? Are you okay?" Sakura asked, moving to kneel next to her other teammate. She ran her hands laced with chakra along her friend, over the course of his body.

"I…I think it was Naruto who cushioned my fall. His hard head must have knocked me out." Sai spoke, looking at Naruto next to him.

Naruto let out a weak smile. Sakura noticed that he seemed more relaxed and was trembling less, now that the bone was in place. She could have laughed at the jab from Sai but right now she needed to bandage Naruto up.

Kakashi appeared before them and offered a hand to Sai, who accepted.

"Yamato has gone ahead to scope out the blast." He said, brushing off his vest. There were leaves stuck in his hair and looked rather a mess but Sakura figured she'd worry about telling him about that later. She reached for her medic bag and produced bandages and splints and went to work on fixing up Naruto's arm. When she was finished, she stood and held a hand out to him and helped him up. He wobbled slightly, grabbing onto Kakashi's shoulder in order to keep himself steady. His right arm was bent and placed snuggly against his chest, the splint wrapped tightly to keep his arm from moving. It was held in a sling over his shoulder. Sakura took a moment to admire her work before shift her eyes over to Kakashi.

"Are we going?" She asked. Kakashi nodded.

"Naruto. You are to stay back. Let us do the fighting…if there is to be any that is." Kakashi spoke.

Naruto moved to protest but cringed from the pain in his arm. After a few moments he nodded. Of course he wasn't happy about but tough shit, Sakura thought. She packed up her medical bag and slung it back over her shoulder.

"Let's go." She said, nodding to Kakashi. With that they all took off, Naruto at a slower pace. She couldn't worry about him right now. He was fine at the moment and there were other pressing matters at hand. Like what the hell had caused that explosion and who it was that caused it.

They didn't have to go far, Yamato had left many of his clones in the surrounding trees telling them how far ahead they needed to go. Sakura was running behind Kakashi and she could feel chakra—an immense chakra source—up ahead. It was violent; creeping into her senses causing her to become confused for a moment. She was about to ask Kakashi his thoughts when she was suddenly jumped on from behind causing her to stumble from the added weight on her back. She instantly surged up chakra into her fist when an arm wrapped tightly over her shoulders and a whiny voice entered her ear.

"Sakuraa-chaaaaan…It hurts to run!" Naruto complained, latching his legs around her hips. Of all the…

"Naruto, what the hell? Get off me!" She hissed tilting backwards hoping it would cause him to fall off. No such luck. He clenched his legs tighter around her hips and his one good arm grasped much tighter around her shoulders.

"No! I don't want to have strawberries with my ramen! You can't make me!" He blurted out, half mumbling. Oh boy.

Sai ran up to them and looked as if he wanted to laugh at the sight but held back when he caught Sakura's expression. She was pissed. And worried.

"Sai. Help me. He's delirious. Probably from his concussion. Get him off of me." With a couple of yanks and lurches, and some definite forming bruises, they'd successfully peeled Naruto off of her. They laid him down on the ground and she pumped some chakra into his head, placing him into a semi coma. He needed to rest and leaving him here was the best option. He couldn't fight and with only one arm he had no way of performing any sort of jutsu. She looked up at Sai who peered back questioningly at her. She was going to ask him to stay here with Naruto but from the immensity of the chakra ahead she knew that Sai was probably needed with them and not as a glorified babysitter. A clone of Yamato's suddenly popped out from a tree, taking on the true form of their senpai.

"I'll stay with him. You two go ahead. Kakashi is already there." He said, nodding at them before taking a seat on the ground next to a bubbling Naruto. Sakura nodded her thanks before taking off, Sai close behind her.

She matched Kakashi's chakra away from the large chakra and slid to a stop next to him. Before she spoke her eyes widened at the clearing before her. Trees had been blasted from the ground, their roots exposed and burned. Everything was charred and the smell of burnt flesh was overpowering. There were bodies and body parts strewn everywhere. In the center of the clearing stood a person, their back was to them but…Sakura knew who it was. That sour feeling was back in her stomach and she felt like throwing up. It was…him.

She felt Kakashi put a hand on her arm. Was he holding her back? What did he think she was going to do? Run out there screaming like a fangirl? She wasn't that girl anymore. She couldn't afford to be that immature girl anymore. But…she almost felt compelled to move forward, like something was pulling her towards him. No. She'd fight it. She had to fight it. She yanked her arm from Kakashi's hand, causing him to glance at her briefly, his expression not revealing a thing. Sakura kept her face steeled, not wanting to show her former sensei how much turmoil she was in. They all must think she was still that stupid little girl, running after Sasuke, trying to get his attention any way possible. She would show them.

A shadow was casted over her, blocking out the sun and she felt her insides freeze. She instantly jumped back in shock at Sasuke in front her. How could he move so fast? How could she not have sensed him? She looked at him. He was staring down at her, his expression frozen. Why was he staring at her? Why wasn't she moving away yet?! His eyes were black and glazed over…he was looking at her—no—looking _through_ her. What was wrong with him? The veins in his neck and face were bulging and pulsating. His skin was pallid and almost green. Was he sick? Before she could understand what was going on, Sakura had been shoved to the side, landing painfully on her hip a good ten feet away, by Kakashi. She lurched back to her feet and found that where she stood only moments before had been smashed and cut by Sasuke's blade. He…he tried to kill her?

' _Yes you idiot! He just tried to filet you like a fish! Get a move on you dummy!'_

Sakura shook her head. She hadn't heard inner Sakura in years. Sasuke just tried to kill her! When he'd left the village after the war, she thought they'd all left on good terms! He even said goodbye to Naruto and ACTUALLY gave her a brief one-armed hug before poking her in the forehead, right between the eyes, saying thank you. Whatever that meant. She shook her head and charged fists full of chakra. If he wanted to fight then a fight he'll receive.

"Kakashi!" She yelled, before winding her arm up and punching the earth beneath them. Kakashi had gotten the drift and leapt into the clearing when the ground began to quake and rupture, splitting around them. Trees fell, boulders crumbled. When the dust settled, Sakura found herself alone. Where-?!

A ball of flame suddenly appeared before her and she launched herself out of the way. The heat from the flame singed the jounin vest she wore. That was close. A punch suddenly erupted from the smoke and landed into her stomach and she felt blood and spittle fly from her throat and onto the ground. She collapsed to the ground, seeing stars. A foot landed on her back, causing her to fly across the clearing before a fallen tree stopped her. She heard her spine crack slightly and she coughed up more blood. Why was he attacking her?! This can't be Sasuke. He didn't have the curse mark activated…so he wasn't completely out of his mind. Was he? He seemed like he was sick…his skin was off color and those veins…Was he poisoned? She'd only seen something like this once before during the war when some biological poison gas had been used on some of their shinobi. Their bodies had become green like, veins bulging, their eyes…had become bloodshot and bled out like they were crying. The inflicted didn't see what was before them, like they couldn't see that they fighting their own people. Their allies. It had taken Sakura, Tsunade and Shizune almost a week to find and create enough of an antidote and by then they'd lost a number of shinobi to the poison and others from getting in the way of the poisoned.

She looked up at the man before her and she didn't see Sasuke. It wasn't him. It couldn't be him. Something was controlling him. He was staring down at her and through her fading vision she caught a flicker of something. His eyes flashed to the Sharingan briefly before going back to the glazed over onyx. He grimaced and relaxed, stepping back like he was catching himself from falling. He reached his free hand up and it clenched the side of his head. The other hand dropped his sword and it landed with a clatter on the ground. Both of his hands grasped his head as if he was in intense pain. He was trembling. Suddenly, a pair of hands shot out from the ground and latched them onto his ankles, holding him in place. Kakashi!

Sakura ignored the pain racing up her spine and jumped to her feet. She resumed pumping chakra into her fists and stood at attention in case he attacked again. Another Kakashi appeared further behind Sasuke. 'It must be his clone underground.' She figured. She started to move forward, knowing that was expected to incapacitate him.

"Arrrrrrgh Sasuke!" She yelled, running at him in great bounds. She had to do this. This wasn't Sasuke. She had to help him. Right when she was about to land her punch she met air and was knocked to the left, landing unceremoniously in a heap. She felt her ribs crack slightly. Great. She sat up and found Kakashi's clone had emerged from the ground had disappeared in a poof of smoke. The real Kakashi was currently fighting hand to hand with Sasuke, blocking and throwing punches and kicks when he could. Sakura noted Sasuke was so much faster than he was before. There's no way he could be this fast without some kind of enhancement. Whether it's a drug or poison or even a jutsu that was causing him to be like this, she knew she had to stop him. He was a tank. He was berserking. Almost like Juugo. Fight and fight and fight until you died. You feel nothing. You fight. You kill.

Tree roots shot out from the ground wrapping themselves around Sasuke, allowing Kakashi to leap away. She could see her sensei was aching. Darn guy was getting old. Yamato appeared next to her, his arms transformed into the roots that were holding Sasuke in place. A cracking and creaking explosion was heard and she whipped her head around and saw that Sasuke had burst from his bindings and was once again brandishing his sword. She just realized that she'd never heard him say anything. Not even once. He definitely wasn't in his right mind. Whatever happened to him had to be biological and had been introduced to his body with him knowing. Or maybe…this was another one of his ways to become stronger. She didn't want to think that he'd resort to biological drugs to enhance his prowess but then again…she never really had the opportunity to get to know this older Sasuke.

A blur blocked out the sunlight once again and she looked up to see Sai on one of his large ink birds circling high above them. He was performing a jutsu, drawing away on his scrolls before there were large ink spears raining down on them. She quickly jumped up and scrambled away, not wanting to be speared to the ground.

 _ **Thok thok thok thok**_ _!_

The spears pierced themselves into the ground all around them and she saw Kakashi brandish one before running at Sasuke with the intent to run him through. Sakura paused. No…

"Kakashi! Don't kill him! He's under the influence of something! Something is controlling him!" She screamed, hoping, just HOPING that she'd get through to either of them. Kakashi seemed to have heard but proceeded to move forward and raised the spear and smacked it across the Uchiha's head. Sasuke flew out of the clearing and a trail of smoke was seen left in his wake.

Maybe…maybe he'd been knocked out. Then she could help him! She darted towards the trail of ground overturned and raced towards her former teammate, only to find the landing sight empty. A fist appeared next to her face and she jumped to her right out of the way.

"Sasuke! This isn't you! Wake up!" She yelled, creating chakra scalpels with her hands. She stood at the ready, looking up at the grown man before her. He was staring at her, smirking. He was smirking! She was pissed now. This was going on too long. She needed to end this.

"Sasuke! We're taking you back with us! We're going to help you. Whatever this is, we're going to get help and heal you! But right now—" She paused and tapped briefly into the source of chakra stored in her forehead, taking just enough chakra to form a large amount of chakra into her fist. This was it. If this didn't work…she was as good as dead. And hell…she didn't need to be dead. She had too much to live for. She wasn't going down like this.

Sasuke's smirk grew wider and he let out a small chuckle. He summoned Chidori into his right arm and held his other hand at her, bending and waving his fingers at her, taunting her to come at him. She pushed chakra into her feet and leaped forward. She couldn't believe that she was doing this—she'd never fought him for so long before. She'd never been able to stay in a fight with him this long at all to begin with. She was going to finish this. Nothing else mattered except saving Sasuke from whatever afflicted him.

Running forward she wound her arm back as far as she could. "SASUKEEEEE!" She yelled, before launching her fist towards him just as he raised his Chidori. Their fists met and she felt a shockwave thrust itself into her arm, under skin; lightning weaving itself into her body. There was an explosion and then a bright light before there was nothing.

* * *

Sakura opened her eyes and gasped. She was…in the hospital? Does that mean she didn't die? Was Sasuke okay?

Okay… back up. So she wasn't dead. That's good. She wiggled her toes and fingers. Even better. She didn't have any nerve damage.

When she had come at Sasuke with such a large amount of chakra there were bound to be consequences. Like death maybe. Hell…she didn't think ahead about anything at all. She just ran at him. She groaned as pain reared its ugly face in the back of her head.

She grimaced and lifted a hand to soothe the pain with chakra. When nothing happened she tried her other hand. Nothing.

"Ugh, great. Chakra exhaustion." She stated to herself. She took a moment to look at her hand and frowned.

Good grief…when did her hands get so manly looking? All these callouses too…when was the last time she had a manicure? She needed to make some time for herself get her nails did. She needed to take care of herself more. No wonder she hadn't had a date in a while. All the guys probably took one look at her man-hands and took off in the other direction before she could even blink.

She sighed and swallowed. She really had to go to the bathroom. She glanced at the nurse call button next to her bed and decided against it. She could manage something simple as peeing.

She sat up and swung her legs over the sighed and gasped. Good god! When was the last time she shaved her legs!? She was pretty sure she'd done it before the mission…then again she was prone to constantly forgetting to put deodorant on and even brushing her hair before work. She had such a busy life she barely found the time to eat a decent meal at all. She'd been eating so much ramen lately she was certain she was going to wake up one morning AS Naruto. She snorted. That'd be the day when she woke up as Naruto.

'Okay…note to self. Treat yourself to a spa day and make a date with a razor.'

She pushed herself up and wobbled slightly. She felt taller. Probably from lying down for who knows how many days. The human body had the tendency to relax enough that it allowed joints and the bones connected to the joints and the muscles to relax and extend making you taller when you get up in the morning.

Well. She certainly felt taller. Almost towering. She made her way to bathroom, dragging the IV pole connected to her arm. Just as she opened the door, the hospital room door flung open and a blond blur flew in and launched itself at her.

"Temeeeee! You're alive!" Naruto shouted. He was about to lunge at her again only to be help back by an annoyed Tsunade.

'Wait…did he just call me…Teme?'

That asshole. How dare he call me that!? She reached up and smacked Naruto, only to be surprised when he barely flinched. Oh right. Chakra exhaustion.

"Oi! The hell was that for you bastard!?" Naruto yelled, pouting and holding his throbbing cheek.

"You asshole! How dare you call me that, you baka!?" She yelled in a deep voice.

What. The. Fuck.

Shock came from two places.

One from Sakura herself because she didn't get why her voice sounded so deep—probably from not having anything to drink in a great while.

The second form of shock was present on Naruto and Tsunade's faces.

"Eh heh…baka? You sound like Sakura-chan." Naruto laughed lightly.

"Maybe because I AM Sakura?" She said. Her hands flew up to her mouth, covering her lips.

The hell? Her voice was so deep.

Tsunade was suddenly in front of her studying her with her hands and then shining a light into her eyes. She settled back on her heels and crossed her arms.

"Hmm…I vaguely remember hearing something like this happening before. So it _**is**_ possible." She spoke quietly.

"What's possible, obaa-chan?" Naruto asked, glancing in between the both of them, looking utterly confused.

He wasn't the only one.

"Tsunade-shishou…what's going on?" Sakura asked, her deep voice vibrated down to her chest.

"Shishou? Sasuke…are you sure you didn't hit your head?" Naruto asked.

"What? Sasuke?" Sakura asked. What the hell was going on?

"Naruto. I need to speak with him alone for moment. Leave." Tsunade spoke, her eyes never leaving Sakura's.

Naruto gulped at the order and took the hint before backing out of the room and shutting the door. That was very unlike Naruto. Usually he put up more of a fight than that.

"Shishou?" Sakura asked. Tsunade was really short, she noticed. Sakura had never noticed she'd grown taller than her teacher. They'd always stood eye to eye before today.

"Have you ever heard of a Full Body Transfer Jutsu?" Tsunade asked few moments.

"You mean like Ino's Kekkei Genkai?" Sakura needed something to drink, her throat was parched and getting sore.

"Almost, but that's a _MIND_ Transfer Jutsu. What I'm talking about is , from what I read, full body, or even a soul, transfer jutsu. It takes an incredible amount of perfectly channeled chakra from both parties. I didn't know it was even possible until now. I'm still unsure of how it really works."

Sakura was seriously confused.

"Tsunade-sama, what are you talking about?" She asked, feeling her headache intensify.

Tsunade sighed and shook her head. "See for yourself, Sakura." She waved a hand towards the bathroom. Sakura looked at her teacher before remembering that she had to pee like a racehorse. She walked into the bathroom and flipped the light on and felt her stomach drop to her feet. She let out a strangled cry.

There. In the mirror…her reflection was Sasuke Uchiha. Her heart practically exploded in her chest.

"Tsunade-sama!" She yelled, backing out of the bathroom, the IV ripping from her arm. She found her mentor staring back at her with a pensive expression.

"Tsunade!" Sakura urged. "This has to be genjutsu!" She pushed her hands together. "KAI!"

Nothing happened. She looked down at herself. She flung open the hospital robes that she was dressed in and squeaked closing them and flushing a deep red. 'Ohmygodohmygodohmygodohmygod that was—.'

"Well. Now I can say that I've seen an Uchiha naked." Tsunade drawled, a faint pink blush resting on her cheeks. Sakura felt like crying. Tsunade was _actually_ joking at a time like this!?

"This can't be real! I must have really died! I've died and gone to hell! Yeah…that's gotta be it." She was beginning to sound like a crazy person.

"Sakura. Look at me." Tsunade barked, putting her hands onto her—or Sasuke's?—shoulders. "Listen to me. We'll get to the bottom of this. Trust me. There has to be a cure."

Sakura felt tears well up in her eyes. Oh my god. This was really…this was really happening. 'I'm really…Sasuke.'

"Um Sakura?" Tsunade suddenly spoke up. Sakura let out a sob. She could feel the coldness in her stomach be overwhelmed by a sudden warm sensation.

"I…have to go to the bathroom." She spoke with a shaky voice. She felt like she was going to be sick. And she had to pee. Really bad. Wait…to pee she would have to hold…hold his…

"Sakura, I don't think you need to worry about that anymore." Tsunade said, taking a careful step back away from her. Through her tears, Sakura looked at her teacher's scrunched up face. Tsunade nodded towards Sakura and Sakura looked down and let out a cry of dismay.

She'd freaking pissed herself.

Shit.

The door slammed open again Naruto came bursting in.

"Tsunade-obaachan! I can't stand it any longer! What's going on—" Naruto stopped and stared at the crying Sakura—er Sasuke, before looking further down at the front of her robes and then at the puddle on the floor. His face contorted and his cheeks bulged out before he busted out laughing.

"Hahahaha! Oh my god! Sasuke-teme peed himself! Oh my god! I've gotta tell Sakura!" He continued laughing, clutching his stomach with one hand and pointing at Sakura with the other.

Sakura flooded into tears before running into the bathroom and slammed the door. This can't be happening! She was Sasuke? How was that possible? Wait…if she was in Sasuke's body then that must mean—

'Oh my god.'

That meant that Sasuke was in her body. Somewhere. She was walking around and it wasn't her in her body.

Her head hurt. She felt cold. Why was the floor getting closer? It felt good—her head hitting the floor didn't but the cool tile felt good on her cheek. Sleep felt good right about now. This was a nightmare. She must be dreaming. Yep…she was going to wake up and everything was going to be back to normal.

* * *

"Wait…so let me get this straight. This isn't Sasuke?"

' _What? No, of course I'm not Sasuke. I'm Sakura.'_

"Right. It's called a Full Body Transfer Jutsu. I've never actually seen it done before, so this is a new area for me."

' _What? Are they still going on about that soul transfer stuff?'_

"Okaaaaaay…so if this is Sakura…then Sasuke is in…"

"Correct. Sasuke is in Sakura's body."

Sakura snapped her eyes open and grabbed onto Naruto's arm.

"Holy shit! Don't scare me like that, teme—er—Sakura-chan!" Naruto yelped.

Sakura looked at the hand—her hand?—attached to Naruto's arm. It wasn't hers. She looked tiredly up at her friend and then at her teacher.

"So this is real. I wasn't dreaming." She had Sasuke's voice.

Tsunade reached out and grasped Sakura's hand and looked down at her.

"I'm sorry, Sakura. But no…you weren't dreaming. This is for real."

Sakura closed her eyes.

"Whooooooa. This is super weird. Hey wait! Sasuke and I are both guys so we can bathe together. But Sakura is in Sasuke's body so no one would know that it was Sakura in there. I'd technically be taking a bath with Sakura-chan…" Naruto was talking to himself. "Hey Sakura-chan! Wanna go take a bath together?!"

Both women knocked him out at the same time.

Sakura settled back into the bed and looked at the annoyed Tsunade.

"Where's Sasuke—or me or whatever. Is he here in the hospital too?" She asked.

Tsunade nodded. "He's already aware of what's going on. I went and spoke with him after you passed out in the bathroom." Sakura felt her stomach drop.

The door suddenly slammed open. Sakura jolted up and gasped. She was—well _**her**_ body was standing in the doorway panting as if she'd just gone for a long run around the village.

Sasuke.

"Explain. Now." It was her voice…but with Sasuke's cold tone.

Tsunade stood up from the edge of the bed where she was perched. "Come in Sasuke. Thanks for knocking." She scoffed.

Sasuke stepped into the room and shut the door briskly with his foot.

"I see you've changed your clothes. You look cute." Tsunade continued.

"You WHAT?!" Sakura yelled, bolting upright. 'If he changed clothes then…he would have _seen_ me!' Oh my god.

Sasuke stiffened before crossing his arms. He turned his head to the side sticking his nose in the air. "I didn't look if that's what you're worried about."

Sakura flushed and looked at her teacher.

"There should be a cure for this. I, myself, have never seen this happen before. I've read about it. Briefly. I've got some work to do." Tsunade spoke. "Meanwhile. I need you two to stay together. It's the safest way to keep this under wraps."

"What? You mean—" Sakura spoke, panicking at the meaning behind what Tsunade was saying.

"Yes. That means living together. Sakura. Sasuke will stay with you at your house with Naruto while I figure out what needs to be done to reverse this."

If Sakura's jaw could detach and unhinge it would have hit the floor. "No! Tsunade-sama!" It sounded so ridiculous protesting with Sasuke's voice.

Sasuke look downright conflicted. "Tch." He mouthed before turning and storming out of the room.

"You can't be serious." Sakura said not missing a beat when the door slammed.

"I am. You both have to do this. It's for your own safety. Imagine someone coming and trying to kill you thinking you're actually Sasuke. No…I can't let that happen. You're too precious to me." Tsunade quietly mumbled the last part. Sakura felt her anxiety briefly drain away.

"You two need to stick close. Learn from each other. Keep one another safe, while I try and find a cure."

Sakura sighed and flopped back onto the bed.

"Now. You need a shower—" Tsunade ignored the incredulous look on Sakura's face. "—or did you forget that you pissed all over yourself?"

Sakura flushed at the memory before getting up once again and wandering towards the bathroom. She walked past the long forgotten pile of the still out-cold Naruto and entered the small washroom. She gulped, looking at herself in the mirror. Sasuke's black eyes stared right back.

A knock sounded.

"And Sakura? Don't forget to wash _**every**_ part of yourself. Wouldn't want to miss a spot." Tsunade chimed through the door before chuckling.

"Oh god…" Sakura slapped her forehead.

'What am I going to do?'

* * *

 **Wow. Okay. So this just came to me. I'm so exhausted so please forgive me if there are any mistakes.**

 **Okay so I know how the canon story of Naruto goes and how it ends but I'm making my own storyline because I wanna :3**

 **Tell me what you think! This old lady needs sleep. :D**


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